Friday, July 01, 2005
i'm sad today.
for the first time in a few months when i've been cranky. i knew it was bound to happen at some point. i woke up this morning with a sense of dread that things are going to end. its pretty much unfounded... but i just have this odd sense of dread. i don't know why... but its there. i know i tend to be a pretty intuitive person and perhaps i trust my gut too much. i'm not sure. i think this is much more a reflection of me than of any sort of external reality. i prayed that God would help me to surrender to His will, whatever it is... and to not be so concerned about it. maybe that's just the nature of emotions -- what goes up must come down. i just hope that my sense of dread isn't based on any sort of reality or that its some sort of premonition.
... today, i'm thankful that no matter how i feel, that God's hand in my life is real. His goodness to me is real, His love and care is real... and it is unchanging no matter how i feel.
for the first time in a few months when i've been cranky. i knew it was bound to happen at some point. i woke up this morning with a sense of dread that things are going to end. its pretty much unfounded... but i just have this odd sense of dread. i don't know why... but its there. i know i tend to be a pretty intuitive person and perhaps i trust my gut too much. i'm not sure. i think this is much more a reflection of me than of any sort of external reality. i prayed that God would help me to surrender to His will, whatever it is... and to not be so concerned about it. maybe that's just the nature of emotions -- what goes up must come down. i just hope that my sense of dread isn't based on any sort of reality or that its some sort of premonition.
... today, i'm thankful that no matter how i feel, that God's hand in my life is real. His goodness to me is real, His love and care is real... and it is unchanging no matter how i feel.
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