Friday, June 17, 2005
why is it that i have a difficult time writing or blogging when things are going well? maybe its because i am living life rather than merely reflecting on life... things are going so well that i'm just afraid something is going to just drop and everything will end.
well. i have started a detailed post earlier that i want to get back to at some point, but i decided to just write a new one that's more up-to-date for now. i can't believe its only been a week.
what has been a week?
i've had a boyfriend for a week. *insert big huge cheesy grin here*
i can hardly believe that it is actually happening to me. and he's not just some guy that i'm dating. he's the most amazing guy... a guy that i could not have dreamed up... a guy that i could not have hoped would like me. but he does. and he tells me so constantly. i love being around him. as much as i overthink things and tend to run circles about things in my mind, when i'm near him, everything goes away. every doubt, every fear just disappears. as much as i distrust chemistry and the hollywood idea of romance, there is something truly magical about this. something inexplicable. something with God's hand all over it.
i was at one point just worried that i was falling for his charm, but there is so much more to him than just a pretty face and a great smile. there is a joy, an excitment that is unmatched by anyone i've previously encountered. he is talented but humble, genuine, without pretention. his heart is so real and he seeks after the Lord. he's thankful. he's godly.
i'm excited yet fearful at the same time... but i don't want to overthink things to a point where i'm not thanking God for each moment. i would hope that this isn't merely a momentary thing, but if it is, i want to savor every second and know that God is good in good times and in bad times. i'm used to seeing God's goodness in the bad... but can i relax and trust Him truly even in the good?
...today, i'm thankful that goodness is an attribute of God that does not change... it is not situational or experiential, but truly a defining characteristic.
well. i have started a detailed post earlier that i want to get back to at some point, but i decided to just write a new one that's more up-to-date for now. i can't believe its only been a week.
what has been a week?
i've had a boyfriend for a week. *insert big huge cheesy grin here*
i can hardly believe that it is actually happening to me. and he's not just some guy that i'm dating. he's the most amazing guy... a guy that i could not have dreamed up... a guy that i could not have hoped would like me. but he does. and he tells me so constantly. i love being around him. as much as i overthink things and tend to run circles about things in my mind, when i'm near him, everything goes away. every doubt, every fear just disappears. as much as i distrust chemistry and the hollywood idea of romance, there is something truly magical about this. something inexplicable. something with God's hand all over it.
i was at one point just worried that i was falling for his charm, but there is so much more to him than just a pretty face and a great smile. there is a joy, an excitment that is unmatched by anyone i've previously encountered. he is talented but humble, genuine, without pretention. his heart is so real and he seeks after the Lord. he's thankful. he's godly.
i'm excited yet fearful at the same time... but i don't want to overthink things to a point where i'm not thanking God for each moment. i would hope that this isn't merely a momentary thing, but if it is, i want to savor every second and know that God is good in good times and in bad times. i'm used to seeing God's goodness in the bad... but can i relax and trust Him truly even in the good?
...today, i'm thankful that goodness is an attribute of God that does not change... it is not situational or experiential, but truly a defining characteristic.
Comments:
Hope things continue to go well! Things are going well for me as well. I think I may have recorded the greatest piano album of our time, for example! All recorded in one take in concert! It's gotta be a first for debut albums of all original material.
I have a piece on it called "Grace", which was a gift from God, which I think I mentioned to you. I just started playing one day in Sept. of 2003, and it was written as it was played.
Anyway, cheers!
kennyjaworski.com
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I have a piece on it called "Grace", which was a gift from God, which I think I mentioned to you. I just started playing one day in Sept. of 2003, and it was written as it was played.
Anyway, cheers!
kennyjaworski.com
